We live in a dunya where “bigger is better” and “bling” is a word in our vocab. People will go through financial difficulties to show people they don’t really care about that they have money/status/a place in society. Currently, the average wedding in the U.S costs approximately $27,000.
Did your jaw drop? Mine certainly did.
And somehow, Muslim weddings have managed to be taken over by this falseness. Somehow, our brothers and sisters are throwing bigger and more expensive parties for the sake of a union that is already abundantly beautiful and blessed no matter how big the event hall is.
Here we are, an Ummah that is blessed with a glorious deen, a deen that is not interested in money or wealth, but on character and akhlaq. To our Lord who tells us “The material things which you are given are but the conveniences of this life and the glitter thereof; But that which is with God is better and more enduring: Will you not then be wise?” (The Holy Quran, Chapter 28, verse 60)
There is too much pressure on our brothers and sisters for a lavish wedding. Have you been through this? It could be your spouse who wants a big, fancy party, or your parents who are determined to throw the best event(s) money can buy. Or even yourself. Perhaps you are imagining a lavish wedding that has your guests gazing in amazement?
There are people who are set to get married, but want to save up thousands of dollars to have an unnecessary and over-the-top event. Money is thrown around at every angle, from the centerpieces to the cake, and some Muslim weddings have even been seen to have men and women mixing and dancing together because “it’s a special day.”
This day, like everyday, is being watched by Allah. He sees and hears everything we do. Is this how we want to start our lives as husband and wife? With money and material objects being at the forefront of our minds?
The Prophet (saw) was a humble man. He encouraged us to be humble and give in charity. How about having a small gathering at home, with the people that truly care about you? Or a simple masjid gathering? Why not take this money and do something beneficial, like plan a trip to Mecca, or donate it to the many starving children across the world? Start your life without debt.
If we took all the thought, and planning and time that is taken to plan such a huge event, and put it into bettering ourselves as Muslims, and putting the effort into preparing ourselves for marriage, surely this would be more rewarding? The wedding at the most will be a few hours. Your marriage will last a lifetime InshAllah!
So please, ask yourself this: Does having a lavish wedding make a difference to the life my spouse and I will have?