Education vs. Marriage

Education vs. Marriage

A question that often arises on the road to marriage is, “Should I complete my education first or get married first?” Everyone has an opinion on the matter and there is not a universal answer to it as every person, and situation, is different. However, there are a few points to take into consideration when you are contemplating this question.

1) While intellectual compatibility is important, that does not necessarily translate to having the same number of degrees or years of study. Just because a person has had more (or less) schooling than you does not necessarily mean that you are not intellectually compatible. Instead of writing someone off because they don’t have the right level of education speak to them and see if perhaps you are both on the same intellectual level.

2) Getting married does not necessarily mean the end of your education. A lot of singles (particularly sisters) feel they have to make a choice between either marriage or education. While, it is true, that getting married does add more responsibility to your plate it can also motivate you to take your studies more seriously and complete them faster. If you are interested in getting married but aren’t sure how education will fit into your married life, discuss it with your potential other half. You can even outline a plan together beforehand.

3) It is possible to afford both marriage and education. Pursuing higher education can actually be more affordable after marriage. There is more financial aid available to married couples than singles. Financial aid is also calculated just on the income of you and your spouse, without your parents, so you are more likely to qualify. You will also learn to be more responsible with your money as you have a spouse and a future together to look forward to.

There is no doubt that education plays an important role in our lives. It is a means of growing for us as people as well as way to improve our economic status. Education should be pursued however we should also keep in mind that learning occurs not only in school but throughout our lives. Pursuing higher education should not come at the expense of other things we want in life. Instead, we should find a way to reconcile between the things that matter to us and approach it from a practical angle. We should also take the time to learn about other people instead of dismissing them based on their level of schooling.

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Comments (6)

  • Nodding Head Yes Reply

    Thanks for the article.

    Fully agree that marriage and education are NOT mutually exclusive. Bring up the subject with the person you are talking to if you have concerns about how to manage the two and if this person is the right guy/girl for you, you will find a way to make both work.

    October 12, 2013 at 11:52 am
  • saiful islam bin abdul hamid Reply

    Assalam,this is very good article, and i hope that our muslimeen should understand about this especially muslimah because this is always the reason they give when approached by a men to get married.Alhamdulillah, good article. :)

    October 16, 2013 at 3:08 am
  • Nasir M Reply

    Jazak Allah for this excellent topic and your great point of view. I was certainly enlightened to read that just because some one is not on same education level as we are does not mean they are not intellectual on the same level. When I read this I totally agree because I’ve some friends who are not as educated as others but they certainly can pull it off better than those who are more educated. Also a great pointer that financial aid might be more easily available after marriage due to larger family and also you might even be a better student after you are married since now you are more serious. Thanks for writing this :-)
    God Bless.
    Nasir M.

    October 20, 2013 at 5:27 pm
  • Cynthia Reply

    Salaam- many thanks for the wonderful service that you are providing! I’m trying to contact you via your online question form but it is not going through. Here’s my question:

    “I follow the religion of the Prophet Abraham (a Hanif) & am a non-Jewish, non-Christian, non-Muslim monotheist. In the past, I rec’d a Fatwah stating “your belief in the common fundamentals of divine religions makes you much closer to Islam than the present day Judaism or Christianity. Therefore there is no bar in your marriage with [a Muslim man].” That relationship morphed into a strong platonic friendship rather than leading to marriage. As a result, I am interested in joining your marriage site, but as I am not a Muslim, I am writing for permission.

    Additionally, I am 61 years old, living in the U.S. & looking for a devout Muslim who is living in the U.S. & is either already a Permanent Resident or a Citizen. My interest in having a Muslim man as a life partner is that I feel they are more honorable & trustworthy. The age group that I am interested in is 40-64 (only a younger man, IF they have been married in the past & already had children). Do you have many members in that age range in the U.S.?

    As an aside, my adult son is half Persian & a professor of Islamic Studies. And, my dearest friend is a young female Islamic Activist.

    I await your response.”
    Blessings

    November 13, 2013 at 11:08 am
  • Sharie Reply

    Perhaps for men. Not for women…their educational dreams are often put to the side in favor of their husband’s and sometimes are never completed as they have children or take care of i laws or have to work to support the husband’s education. I wish that one day iA this were not the case. But for a lot of cultures it is.

    November 24, 2013 at 3:52 pm
  • Takaeang Taatii Reply

    Thanks for the artical
    Fully understand to how to avoid proplem in
    early marriage and I aim to marriage after l get
    a higher job to face the proplem for my family

    March 21, 2017 at 1:44 am

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